So I was off reading Maurnas blog a wee bit ago and she went through the number of her sexual partners all her life.
She even has a table. Like an honest to goodness table of percentages and everything. I’m so impressed.
Which got me thinking.
We are so hung up on the number of people everyone’s slept with aren’t we? I know Loki is having a few issues swallowing (oh the things I could say) the number of my sexual conquests.
Let’s start with the fact that:
A) I don’t know the exact number. I went on a rampage of about 3-9 guys a week at one point for roughly a 7 month period.
Averaging that out the mean comes to: Σ 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 = 42 So then if we go 42 ÷ 7 = 6
So average of 6 per week for 7 months @ 28 weeks (going on 4 weeks a month) = 168
Let’s add-on all my partners 168 + 8 = 176 … err I forgot to add-on some of my friends.. say about 10 – so overall number:
All in all that’s not a bad number if I do say so myself.
However this brings us to the next question, why oh why is the number so important?
I’d love to say that slut shaming is a myth. It’s not. Women all over are adjusting the number of people they’ve slept with to a more “acceptable” number. I think it’s about 10. Why? Does the fact that I was a highly sexual being when I was in my 20’s limit who I am now? Does my cunt work differently somehow? Because from what I gather, it works fine. Like any muscle the more you work it the better it gets no? Well I don’t know about that, all I know is that there’s something to be said about having a g-spot orgasm that makes me feel like I’ve done 3 months worth of kegals in one go.
Er, back to case on point.
Here’s an actual table of the number of sexual partners from a survey in 2009:
So being that I’m a Turkish Australian what does this graph say about me? Well. I guess it just says that I’m more highly sexual than most.
Coming back to the slut shaming though, wiki explains it as:
It is a neologism used to describe the act of making any person feel guilty or inferior for certain sexual behaviors or desires that deviate from traditional or orthodox gender expectations, or that which may be considered to be contrary to natural or religious law.
As a kinky pervert I guess I already fit outside the traditional or orthodox gender expectations. As someone who loves sex and especially having it with someone who I’ve got an emotional and mental connection with makes it even better. This ties into why I wasn’t having a stupid amount of sexual relations when I could.
Plus, I’ve masturbated furiously to Loki talking about setting up final fantasy macro’s once. And once your partner hears you get off to gaming talk, there’s no going back.
So all in all, what I wanted to know is why people feel the need to make someone less of what they are depending on how many people they’ve slept with? Why does putting out on the first date mean that you aren’t an acceptable partner? Why do people find the number of people who’ve been in my cunt so fascinating? Why do we feel the need to tie in sexual relations to the morality of someone?
Just because I like sex doesn’t make me less of a person. It just makes me secure in my sexuality. I know what I like. Yet it’s not my sex life that’s made me who I am, it’s my life experiences with interacting with people outside of the bedroom.